She became more and more alive, not so much to a system of ideas as to a big diffused impulse toward change, to a great discontent with and criticism of life as it is lived, to a clamorous confusion of ideas for reconstruction—reconstruction of the methods of business, of economic development, of the rules of property, of the status of children, of the clothing and feeding and teaching of every one; she developed a quite exaggerated consciousness of a multitude of people going about the swarming spaces of London with their minds full, their talk and gestures full, their very clothing charged with the suggestion of the urgency of this pervasive project of alteration. She could have kissed Cathy. I didn’t dream, not even in my wildest dreaming, that—you might have any need of me. You must think of this evening, John, sometimes—as a sort of atonement. Now keep still. Her head dipped deeply into the current, and she narrowly escaped being swamped. She had not thought anything could equal her despair at that moment. Even in her own sorry skin-and-bones state of wraithlike pallor and gray under eye circles she was drawing unwanted attention from would-be admirers. Yet either the rest or the wine seemed already to have done him good. But all that could be ascertained in the village was, that a man had ridden off a short time before in the direction of London. I didn't mean it. ” “I cannot do it!” he cried hoarsely.
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